Elysha's World

Elysha's World

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Fight or Flight and Paying it Forward

Happy first day of October! I have this slight obsession with the artist who helped write and sing the above song. I had this song stuck in my head a little today. Her name is Brooke Fraser. She’s a Pop/Christian singer from New Zealand. Her album Albertine is my absolute favorite, and I definitely own it. Her music videos are not my favorite, but they’ve definitely gotten better in the last few years. All of her songs are laid back and have a great message. I love Christian music. I have over 200 CD’s in my collection, and over 75 of them are signed CD’s from LDS/Christian artists. I love to be uplifted, inspired, and surrounded by good music.

I’ve been in kind of a funk this past week. I don’t really want to go out and do things. I blame most of this on the fact that it’s suddenly cold outside! I get cold very easily. However, it seems like whenever I throw myself one of these “pity parties” after a few hours, I’m good to go again, and I’ve found someone who needs my attention more than I do. Sometimes I just want to sit in my room, be by myself, and be an emotional girl. It happens to the best of us. One of my favorite quotes by Lorenzo Snow is about finding others who are more in need than you are. 

“When you find yourselves a little gloomy, look around you and find somebody that is in a worse plight than yourself; go to him and find out what the trouble is, then try to remove it with the wisdom which the Lord bestows upon you; and the first thing you know, your gloom is gone, you feel light, the Spirit of the Lord is upon you, and everything seems illuminated.”

I remember when I when I was a freshman in college, I typed up this quote, printed it out, and hung it up on my wall as a reminder to not get so down on myself. (A little side note about that. I also misspelled part of the quote which hung on my wall. This helped remind me that I was human and had faults of my own, but not to dwell on them.) Yesterday someone from my ward randomly came and knocked on my door, just to see how I was doing. It was probably less than a 5 minute video, but it made my night. I decided I should probably follow her good example, and I spent the next two hours visiting with girls in my ward. I just walked from apartment to apartment visiting and seeing how everyone was doing. They maybe thought I was trying to help them, but really I was the one who’s spirits were lifted.

 It started raining, and as I walked back to my car. I wanted to come home and just relax, even though that’s really what I’d been doing all day long. Before I made it to my car, I remembered that there were some girls from my mission that lived across the street from where I was, and they asked me last week to help them with their English homework. So I walked across the street and found out that all of their roommates needed some help with their homework. Their apartment has two native Japanese speakers and two native Mandarin speakers. I ended up being over there a lot longer than I planned, but once again, I was the one smiling as I left the apartment. I also discovered that explaining the meaning of English words is extremely difficult. How do you explain what a region is, what the word available means, or what context is? I came up with some pretty creative examples. 

When I got home I realized that because one person spent five minutes of her time checking up on me, I payed it forward and gave two hours of my time to other people. #sharegoodness

I went to institute tonight and ran into the guy that I wrote about in this blog post in August. http://elyshasworld.blogspot.com/2014/08/how-do-you-define-yourself.html
I haven’t seen or heard from him in a few months. I didn’t recognize him at first, and then when I did my stomach dropped a little bit. I was surprised to get that reaction from myself. (The only time I'd thought about him was when I saw his name in my phone while searching for a different contact. I wanted to delete it, but if he accidentally pocket dials me, I want to know who it is so I don't call him back.)  In all honesty I wanted to get up and leave before he noticed I was there, if he hadn’t already. As it was, I went and sat in the very back corner by myself because I didn’t want to be noticed. I went so I could have some social interaction, but I didn’t feel cute at all, so even driving over there I almost turned around a few times. Now I had even less desire to be there. I’d gone to a new class and he was there. I couldn’t leave however, because I’d already told them I would offer the closing prayer. 

So instead I sat a little taller in my seat, tried to ignore my fight or flight response, and enjoyed the class. At the end I knew he’d know I was there whether he wanted to or not. After the end of the class I helped put a few of the chairs away. By the time I left, he was long gone. I guess he had less of a desire to be there than I did. I was glad I stayed and stuck around until the end, and even made some new friends while I was at it. 

This last video by Brooke Fraser I don’t really care for. I just REALLY like the song. But it’s been raining a lot lately, so I guess it’s kind of appropriate. 

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