While at church today I started thinking about who God really is. There are a lot of different theories. A lot of people believe that he is an all-powerful person. Someone who controls the universe. Some see him as a mean God full of wrath and hate. Some people think God is like Zeus or other God’s like him. While I lived in Taiwan I was able to see a lot of different perspectives on what other people believed God to be. Some believe Buddha is their God. Some pay homage to their God or ancestors by lighting incense. I think of God as the powerful creator of the universe, but also so much more. I like to think of Him as my father. Like the song at the beginning of this blog states, I am His daughter. I think growing up believing this has shaped who I am in a way.
I love meeting new people! I love hearing their stories, and I love learning what they believe. I like to see what people are really made of. I like to hear about their trials, and how they overcame them. I love looking up how songs came to be. I like to know why lyricists write the words they do, and what events triggered them to write and convey such powerful and emotional creations.
Today, I’d like to convey a little of who I am and what I believe. I believe that God created this world for us to enjoy. As I type this I’m sitting in my front yard on my laptop. My computer dies if it isn’t plugged in, so I’m facing a huge shrub so I can still be out in the sun, while my computer is plugged in. There are crazy squawking birds talking to each other. I used to get easily upset by them, but they just kind of add to my surroundings and belong here now. I have an amazing view of the mountains and trees. I love seeing the leaves change colors.
I believe that God is a kind and caring God. I believe that he looks a lot like you and I. I have no doubt in my mind that He is aware of my every move. He directs me and leads my path in every aspect of my life. There have been many times when I have been invited to go to a party or asked out on a date, and I just don't feel quite right about it. I feel like that is the Lord telling me to stay home or find something else to do with my time. I've never been disappointed when I follow what many people would call their "instinct." I call it personal direction from a loving Father in Heaven.
When I feel like I should visit a friend, call a friend, or send a text message, I think that’s Him giving us the opportunity to bless one of His other children. I’ve had numerous experiences with this. In fact a few years ago I was sitting in church when I felt the need to call my friend. I hadn’t talked to her in a few years, and we weren’t that good of friends. I pushed the thought aside and went about my business. I had this same thought and feeling over and over throughout the day. Finally I figured I’d just do it, because it wasn’t going to hurt me either way.
I called her as I walked home. I was anxious to get it over with, but nervous as to what I should say. “Hey, remember me? I know we haven’t talked in a while, and this is a little weird, but I was just thinking about you all day long, and I thought I should give you a call.” The beginning of our conversation went something like that. A few minutes into it, she asked me if I knew what day it was. I thought about it for a second and then said, “Sunday?” She then proceeded to tell me that it was her birthday, and that no one had called her or said anything about it to her all day, and she had started to feel a little forgotten. Then I called her and it lifted her spirits and made her day.
I didn’t know it was her birthday. I hadn’t thought about her in over a year, but I believe that God knew where she was, and that she needed a friend. I also think that if I hadn’t have listened to that small prompting, that He would have found someone else to let His daughter know that she was cared about.
I grew up in a single parent home. Sometimes there were things that I wanted to ask my dad about, or I needed some advice, but he wasn’t there. We didn’t talk and I never felt I could trust him to answer questions to the things I needed answers to. In high school I had a friend who was in a similar situation, and she suggested that I did indeed have a father that I could talk to anytime night or day. She said sometimes she’d pray unconventional prayers that she’d start off by saying, “Dad, I know you’re up there, and I know you’re my Father in Heaven, but right now I just need a dad to listen to what I have to say and just let me know I’m making the right decision.”
After that experience, I decided to try it. I went into my room, knelt down, and I told the Lord how it was. I had a hard time focusing in my prayers so I decided to picture my favorite place and then imagine that He was there as well, just the two of us. This place has changed as I’ve gotten older. Now, whenever I have a deep meaningful prayer, I picture myself standing in the huge stadium next to my house. There’s no one there but the Lord and I. Usually I walk around the stadium and tell Him in detail what I’m thinking about. Sometimes I’m yelling at Him from across the stadium because I’m so upset at Him, other times I’m crying sitting right next to Him with His arms wrapped around me. I always feel like I get a better connection and am able to focus my prayers better when I do this. I don’t do it all the time, but maybe I should.
I had a friend who was going through a really hard time, and so I told her about the way I prayed, and told her to try it and see if she got a different answer/ feeling than her short to the point prayers. She wrote me a letter back and this is what it said:
“Elysha, I'm a horrible friend, I sit and think about myself and my problems and ignore everyone else. I play games on my kindle ALL day. My prayers go like this “Heavenly Father, Please bless me that I'll have good dreams and not have any more nightmares, In the name of Jesus Christ Amen. My scripture reading is a verse a day in a random spot that I open my scriptures too, well it has been for this last month. I tried out your prayer. I imagined I was at my farm by my horses sitting on my hood with Heavenly Father. I called him Dad. I told him everything I felt, how afraid I am, and especially talked to him about how you told me he was watching everything that happened to me, that he knows what truly happened. I felt understood, loved, and like I knew that he was going to take care of me. I don't know if Lance is the one, I have postponed the wedding, you are the only one besides family and a couple other people that know. I am putting my trust in the Lord, whoever he wants me to marry, whatever he wants me to do. I really don't know what I'm supposed to do or where I'm going, but I know it's going to be alright if I do what’s right.”
I believe that prayer is a way to communicate with God. Most parents would like to hear from their children every once in a while. I talk to my mom almost every day. When was the last time you talked to God and let him know how you truly felt about the things that are going on in your life? I know that God hears and answers every prayer. Not one word, thought, or tear goes unnoticed.
If you have any questions or comments about things I’ve mentioned in this post feel free to
comment below or visit http://www.mormon.org/